So, the reason why I think I have some gold nuggets to share with you is that I have a pretty difficult background story – and I’m still here, in many ways doing better than ever.
Over the past 10 years or so, I have suffered through what I call The Tough D’s: Depression, Divorce, the Death of my youngest child, Debt, Diabetes, and an eating Disorder. And lately, anxiety, just to spice things up further.
I say this lightly, but trust me, none of the above was easy. However, there’s a truth to that tired phrase “what doesn’t kill you…”, you know what I mean, and I have found out not only that there’s a will in me to survive, there’s also a burning desire to help others.
My intention with this blog is to shine a light in your darkness. I will fire up my lighthouses and let them guide you through the fog and the starless nights until you see your own lighthouses. This is what I intend to do.
For this purpose, I have long been thinking about the notion of “getting to the essence of things.” I have struggled with low self-esteem for as long as I can remember, but if there is one thing I know that I’m good at, then it’s deriving the essence even from pretty heavy stuff. And I’ve been playing a little game of letters with myself, giving a name to this ability to see clearly: the S-sense. As in: “Sigrid’s way of making sense/deriving the essence”.
For every post I make from now on, I will give you the S-sense on a topic of my choosing. Or yours, if you’d like my opinion on a thought that you have. This is a challenge I give myself as well as an encouragement for you to participate.
What I would like to put in here today is the one thing that I believe enables me to take one blow after another and almost go “thank you”: my firm belief that everything happens for a reason.
Why I had to go through 11 years of marriage to a manipulative and emotionally abusive man was to let me be able to reach out to others who have been through something similar, for example. How can I speak on behalf of women (or men) who have been belittled and threatened and bullied around to the point of believing they deserved it, without having tried that for myself?
Another example is the concept of anxiety, which is still pretty new to me. To be quite honest, I have never understood or even accepted how people can suffer from anxiety until I tried it myself, and I feel ashamed for the condescending thoughts I have had…! But the truth is, no one can really know what it feels like unless they’ve been there. Like with so many things, really.
So, my very brief S-sense for today is: everything happens for a reason.
It will definitely not be the last time I talk about that…